SAYING THANKS TO EVERYONE...

This one's for everyone.... for my mom, dad and grandma here with me.... to my grandpa, in the heaven, to my God, to my Mentor, to my friends, to my teachers, to my classmates and ....
My little pen that makes me write,
My laptop small with its screen wide,
My bag which helps me hold my books,
And the mirror in which I check my looks,
My mobile which keeps me on,
And my ipod for its beautiful songs,
My room white, and my lamp's light,
My campus wide, and its rooms bright.....

Everyone ......... Just want to say thanks... because somewhere somehow you made me what I am...............

BECAUSE IF I OPEN THE DOOR

Diwali, My sweetheart has come again,
Bringing all bliss and all gain,
I love it, but I hate it more,
When Ram comes, I close my door,

But Ram, forgive me if you can,
Ram, understand me if you can,

Because if I open the door,
The voice of the crackers comes in,
My granny can't hear it,
She is a weak heart...
And I love her more than you...

Because if I open the door,
Dust and Smoke comes in,
My Mom gets choked,
And she can't cook the food,
And I love her more than you...

Because if I open the door,
Fire is seen more than light,
My Father gets angry,
And he does not smile,
And I love him more than you...

Because if I open the door,
Ram, I don't see you anywhere,
My visions get blocked in smoky hues,
My happiness gets lost in bomb explosion blues,

Still I fight Ram, when everyone has slept,
I open the door, with my eyes still wet,
In a hope that you will come besides me one day,
And in my hand your blessings you will lay...

But you never come Ram,
Or may be they don't let you ....

I STOPPED MAKING THE FOOTPRINTS OF GOODNESS....

Walking in the forest of emotions, passions, corruptions and deceptions, I clearly remember the mark from where I stopped looking back. My footprints are still there, many rains and pains have not rubbed them off. Behind that mark, there is a series of my footprints, I made them prominent, and after that-- Before taking the next step, I rub off the previous one. I am unclear of deciding whether I am happy or sad about that!! But yes, I am contended.
The forest was always deep, I saw wolfs as much as I saw deers. I saw elephants as much as I saw termites. I saw giraffes as much as I saw ants. The nature, the weights, the heights, never made a difference. I was in love with all of them. One day with a veil, I was traveling my normal way, I saw the wolf conspiring against me, the deer was resisting him, it got killed. I saw the elephant dominating my worth, a million termites were supporting me, they got pressed, died. I heard the giraffe talking about how high he was compared to me, the little ant was displaying over that, it became the meal with the grass.
With tears in eyes, I pondered and thought- why the truthful was killed, the tender was pressed, the sincere one became the meal. And no answer ever came. I loved my ant, my deer, my termites, for they were important. They were my everything in that deep high forest from where sunlight was difficult to see. I thought I must travel back, and see where I made a mistake in loving the wolf, the elephant and the giraffe. Scanning my footprints long back, my hatred grew and my love reduced. I stopped, came ahead. I became the fiercer wolf, and killed him. I became the heavier elephant, I showed him the truth. I became the higher giraffe, I made him feel guilty!! But I am still not happy.
I think sometimes, had my little ant not spoken, she would have been there laughing besides me, if my termites had not resisted, they would have been here, all here, had my deer not got annoyed, he would have been still giggling. In the process of changing the world, I had to become one wolf, one bad elephant, one stupid giraffe.
I wish , we all had been good, good at heart!! For each other, with each other, but I wish we had been a better wolf for the wolf, a heavier elephant with the elephant and a higher giraffe with the giraffe, may be then I would have saved my little ant, deer and termites. I love you all.
I stopped making footprints, because they still hurt, for having been such a good person that we lost it all. May be a little badness , would have kept goodness alive, alive at-least and not dead....

FAITH IS BINARY-0 or 1

Well, going along too well with Digital Circuits these days!! I have been hearing about the two states that are binary- 0 and 1, no confusions, no doubts, clearly just one side of the big lane called life. Either you walk on the left, or you walk on the right, because walking in the middle can mean you being killed by some over-speeding truck of unfelt emotions or confusions.
It is the same with faith I guess, 0 or 1, either you have or you will never have. A faith that comes with belief, from your heart, either the aorta pumps blood or it will not, either the valves will open or they will not, either your heart will say yes- believe it, or it will lie stale and won't speak ever. That's how the story of faith is!!
This one's for a special event that happened to me and I guess, it will last forever with me as my most cherished memory. Special because it gave me the zest to be truthful forever, loyal forever. Someone whom I will call a person of values I have seen in life, there I was standing with a piece of paper, insignificant but important, needing signatures. And this person, looked at it- saw it, and signed, did not read it. And why? Just because it is all about the belief someone has on me, a belief that loaded my heart with the biggest responsibility of the world, to keep that loyality , that faith, that duty of being truthful, enlightened forever. In one little glance, a person who made me duty bound for my whole lifetime, not to cheat ever. Because I know, faith is a thread, and threads broken join with knots. And I do not believe in knots.... Its always about the originality that holds things together. Threads joined by knots are weaker... and again... it is binary--- 1- it holds, 0- it is gone forever....

I KNOW , I KNOW NOT...

I know happiness, sadness I know not,
I know smiles, tears I know not,
I know sincerity, Diplomacies I know not,
I know truth, lies I know not,
I know faith, deceit I know not,
I know to love, hatred I know not,
And the irony is,
I had to know the "KNOW NOTS"... And I ....
Just don't.... Just won't....

I just wanted a little light, not the moon....

I was small. I used to look at the moon and had the desire to get it in my hand. Shining ball of everlasting brightness....And then someone would show me the reflections , I would sprinkle the water up and get happy. Then I grew up!! So did my desires, my convictions, my thoughts, my contemplations, my wishes, my whims.... And I am affirmative the latter grew at a faster pace. This time I thought, I would not ask for the moon, I thought economically, I just wanted the light because according to my extreme selfishness, only that was useful.

I went to God's temple. I said- 'I know God , you love me. But this time , I want a proof. Some kind of evidence, so you have to give me all light that the moon has tonight, just one night , I am not asking for much'. I could see tears trickling down, God's eyes, yet I remained stubborn. I want it. I asked him- Why are you crying. He said-'Nothing'.He agreed. I was happy.
Coming home, i kept thinking, why was God crying??? He is the supreme power. He also has to cry??? Strange.

Night came. I was going to get what nobody had got. Moon's light- eternal, white, shiny, and mine. I kept looking, nothing happened. Night was passing, but I could not see the moon. I looked back, saw God sitting, again crying. This time, he hugged me tight, and said- "I was crying because my daughter asked something for the first time, The moon's light tonight, and I am helpless ". I was still not moved by his tears- I said why??
He said- "Today is No Moon Day"...
Looking at him- I said- You are such a diplomatic. I just wanted a little light, not the moon. And you played a game with me.
He looked back, distressed, broken down by my statement, and lit himself up. I got enough light. More than moon would have given me. But,....
I LOST GOD.....

I need you all !!!

There are many people in the world , seeing whose smiles, I laugh! But surprisingly there are just a few seeing whose sadness I feel hurt! This one's for such special people in my life! They are happy, I feel happy, they are sad, I feel sad. They weep, I cry, they smile, I laugh. They ignore, and I feel alone even with the crowd around me, they are along, I feel surrounded even in thirsty deserts. For all people, who define not just my smiles, but even more the rhythm of my heart, do not ever be angry, do not ever be annoyed with me. If I do a mistake, forgive me. Because you are people, my heart says- are "Mine". Worlds might die down , but I know you will all be standing like trees around me to protect me from every heat stroke. And I am so habitual of your shadows, that I might forget happiness if those shadows go away. I need the shadows, I need you all!!!Be there , like you always have been.....